Acceptance is a Super Power for facing Uncertainty

Acceptance is a modest sounding, kind of unsexy word, and generally met with a slight distrust. As if it might ask us to agree with the unforgiveable or unacceptable.

Actually, acceptance is one of the super-skills we build in mindfulness meditation practice. It equips us to do very courageous and even extraordinary things in the privacy of our inner worlds.

Acceptance trains us to face fears, stand tall in the face of rejection, heartache, anxiety, our own neuroses, shame, in fact any kind of contraction or tension.

We try to fortify ourselves against the precariousness of living a short human life, we build walls, prop up our egos, construct identities, mask vulnerabilities. This is understandable and usually necessary, yet leaves us disconnected, numb, dissatisfied, unable to truly live, to feel connected, joyful, moved by beauty and also to feel and respond with kindness and heartfulness to our own hurt and vulnerability.

At some point we are challenged to live a fuller, deeper life, to feel all of life as it moves and changes. To meet the uncertainties and insecurities face to face, rather than avoid them, block them, or deny them, thereby moving into the distractions, rumination and distancing that cause us more pain the long run.

It can be frightening to soften, open, accept and even embrace uncertainty. The cost of not doing so shows up as dull, busy, tired, going through the motions, a sense of a somehow unfulfilled life, stress and inner and outer conflict and tension.

The rewards of learning gently and skilfully over time to soften and open are aliveness, an intimacy with our own experience, ability to connect with, and trust ourselves more deeply and a sense of truly connecting with life, flowing with it, of pure joy even at the tiniest and most ordinary of moments.

It is wise to embark on this process gently, as we quite naturally hold anxiety about the unknown and  protect ourselves against the overwhelm that might happen if we rush into it. We have many protective habits or patterns. They may have served us well and may have been necessary, but at some point they restrict our growth and become a hindrance.

So how do we learn acceptance? That capacity to face, be with and move through uncertainty, with trust and even calm?

By practicing acceptance, first as a kind of micro-skill, noticing and accepting change, meeting each changing moment, especially the unwanted with curiosity and openness. Noticing contracting, shutting down, rejection of change and meeting that too with curiosity and friendliness.

Mindfulness meditation is one of the most trustworthy methods or skill sets to help us cultivate acceptance. We can practice acceptance in the most ordinary of moments over and over again, and this prepares us for those bigger moments. The bigger disappointments, hurts and fears.